Psychology Topics – What’s Your Attachment Wound?

Available in : Vietnamese


April 12.2021







As infants, toddlers, children, adolescents, and adults, we all have a core need to connect with another human and feel safe in their presence.







In fact, this need to be understood, and accepted by another is the driving force fueling our choices and impacting our relationships. We don’t just want to love and be loved. We need it! Yet, there are so many different ways we didn’t have that need met, and just as many ways that attachment injury from long ago surfaces in our adult relationships.


When we have consistent and reliable caregivers who help us meet this need, we grow up feeling safe, secure, and understood in relationships. This can be called having a ‘secure attachment style’, because we feel secure with ourselves and safe in relationships. The baby who is consistently receiving smiles and eye contact from the mother, as mom coos and lovingly holds him/her is getting that need met. S/he has a great foundation for secure attachment. Unfortunately, not all of us have this experience as babies.







So what about mom or dad who is running late for work, stressed about money, anxious about their own life, and therefore not connecting to the inner world of their child? Or, when the child is upset, Mom/Dad isn’t able to be soothing and present? Well, it’s probably not a big deal if this happens once in a while. However, if this is ongoing (chronic), the little one may experience an attachment wound….







An attachment wound means the inner world was not understood/recognized/accepted by the parent. This emotional attunement, someone ‘getting’ us, is a universal core need for all of us, and is especially necessary to little ones… Continue reading Robert Oleskevich’s article on Hero’s Journey Therapy







Robert Oleskevich, is a licensed psychotherapist, world traveler, and an expat. He lived in over 30 different countries, worked with adolescents, expats, and third culture kids. These days, he provides counseling and therapy to people dealing with the social and emotional challenges of living in Asia, with a focus on expats in HCMC Vietnam.

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Available in : Vietnamese

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